Meat, Schlong, and Cold(ish) Weather

Pre Caramelized Onions

In what is going to be a rare event I have decided to blog my meal live. I have decided to share as I go because 1. I am pretty sure that the meal is going to give me gout (mega points) and 2. I have seen the present episode of The Big Bang theory one too many times.  

As the temperature last week dipped into sweater season (fair-isle is pattern of choice this year) the roommate and myself were waxing poetically about cold weather foods. I went the soup route and had a pregnancy like craving for chicken wild rice. The roommate trumped my weak ass suggestion with wait for it...meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Not one to pass up the opportunity to handle meat I hopped my meat-loving ass onto my bike and got over to Lund's. With 2 lb of beef in my basket I got back to the bachelor pad quicker than a Lean Cuisine is microwaved and inhaled by that girl in the corner cube who actually should eat a real meal.  

With some inquire I determined that the roommate was NOT in the mood for a trendy healthy meatloaf. He wanted a traditional brick of meat. Not one with a family loaf recipe I did some digging. One of my secret treat yo self moments is having a subscription to Cooks Illustrated online. They work magic in that Massachusetts kitchen. I found the recipe below and pretty much fell in love as I mixed.  

As for sides...

I whipped up some horseradish mashed potatoes (we here at the pad have determined if you potatoes don't make you cry and clear your sinuses they are not worth eating).

And the obligatory stuffing. Boxed Stuffing. Sometimes you want it just how Grandma made it. 

Now I know that you are wondering why eat such a warm meal on a warm day? But while Howard is getting his schlong removed from the robot apparatus on Big Bang there is nothing better than the smell of meat ready to unload in my belly. 

Glazed All Beef Meatloaf

RECIPE FROM COOK'S ILLUSTRATED

INGREDIENTS

3 ounces Monterey Jack cheese, grated on small holes of box grater (about 1 cup)

1 tablespoon unsalted butter

1 medium onion, chopped fine (about 1 cup)

1 medium rib celery, chopped fine (about 1/2 cup)

1 medium clove garlic, minced or pressed through a garlic press (about 1 teaspoon)

2 teaspoons minced fresh thyme leaves

1 teaspoon paprika (I used BAY SEASONING)

1/4 cup tomato juice

1/2 cup low-sodium chicken broth

2 large eggs

1/2 teaspoon unflavored gelatin (powdered)

1 tablespoon soy sauce

1 teaspoon Dijon mustard

2/3 cup crushed saltine crackers (I used Panko)

2 tablespoons minced fresh parsley leaves

3/4 teaspoon table salt

1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper

1 pound ground sirloin

1 pound ground beef chuck

Glaze

1/2 cup ketchup (I used Chili Sauce)

1 teaspoon hot pepper sauce

1/2 teaspoon ground coriander

1/4 cup cider vinegar

3 tablespoons packed light brown sugar

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Adjust oven rack to middle position; heat oven to 375 degrees. Spread cheese on plate and place in freezer until ready to use. Prepare baking sheet (see illustration below).

2. Heat butter in 10-inch skillet over medium-high heat until foaming; add onion and celery and cook, stirring occasionally, until beginning to brown, 6 to 8 minutes. Add garlic, thyme, and paprika and cook, stirring, until fragrant, about 1 minute. Reduce heat to low and add tomato juice. Cook, stirring to scrape up browned bits from pan, until thickened, about 1 minute. Transfer mixture to small bowl and set aside to cool.

3. Whisk broth and eggs in large bowl until combined. Sprinkle gelatin over liquid and let stand 5 minutes. Stir in soy sauce, mustard, saltines, parsley, salt, pepper, and onion mixture. Crumble frozen cheese into coarse powder and sprinkle over mixture. Add ground beef; mix gently with hands until thoroughly combined, about 1 minute. Transfer meat to foil rectangle and shape into 10 by 6-inch oval about 2 inches high. Smooth top and edges of meatloaf with moistened spatula. Bake until an instant-read thermometer inserted into center of loaf reads 135 to 140 degrees, 55 to 65 minutes. Remove meatloaf from oven and turn on broiler.

4. While meatloaf cooks, combine ingredients for glaze in small saucepan; bring to simmer over medium heat and cook, stirring, until thick and syrupy, about 5 minutes. Spread half of glaze evenly over cooked meatloaf with rubber spatula; place under broiler and cook until glaze bubbles and begins to brown at edges, about 5 minutes. Remove meatloaf from oven and spread evenly with remaining glaze; place back under broiler and cook until glaze is again bubbling and beginning to brown, about 5 minutes more. Let meatloaf cool about 20 minutes before slicing.

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