Apple Butter

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Apple Butter

Wouldn't it be great if there was a chill in the air, the leaves were just at the peak of turning those shades of yellow and orange that send your mind to fuzzy distant memories, and you had large pot of apple butter simmering on the stove top? 

Instead it's hotter than hell, there's inner thigh chafing, Winona Ryder has made a triumphant return from her days at Saks Fifth Avenue looking fabulous in crazed mother chic, and I have a large pot of apple butter simmering on the stove top causing my beard to frizz and my glasses to steam over. 

Harvest season is upon us folks! Get your Ball Jars and canning tools out because it's time to sweat like you've just walked up the escalators trying to look like you're in a rush. The vegetables and fruit are coming in from the fields hand over fist and you need to keep up! My poor ice box is nearing maximum capacity with frozen berries and my cabinets are stocked full of pickles. My winter larder is going to be phat.  

As I mentioned above I am busy boiling down my apples and caramelizing my sugars with my jars sterilized and at the ready. Soon I will be nestled in corner of the sofa, Murder She Wrote on a loop, and sweat apple butter staining whatever ensemble I have chosen for that day's Netflix binge. 

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APPLE BUTTER

RECIPE FROM GOURMET COOKBOOK 2004 EDITION

INGREDIENTS

4 tart flavored apples, such as Mcintosh, peeled, cored, and cut into 8 wedges each

1 1/2 cups unfiltered apple cider

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1/2 cup packed dark brown sugar

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon ground allspice

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT: four 1/2 pint canning jars with lids and screw bands; a wide 5 to 6 quart heavy pot at least 9 1/2 inches in diameter; a food mill fitted with a fine disk

INSTRUCTIONS

Sterilize jars and lids and wash screw bands.

Chill two small plates for testing butter. Combine all ingredients in pot, cover, and bring to a boil over moderate heat, then reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, stirring occasionally, until apples are tender, about 15 minutes.

Puree mixture in food mill set over a large bowl, then return puree to pot. Simmer over moderately low heat, stirring and scraping bottom of pan frequently (stir constantly and adjust heat toward end of cooking to prevent scorching), until butter is very thick and tests done, 1 1/4 to 1 3/4 hours. Begin testing for doneness at 1 1/4 hours; remove pot from heat while testing. Drop a spoonful of apples butter onto a chilled plate and refrigerate for 1 minute, then tilt plate; butter should remain in a mound and not run.

Drain jars upside down on a clean kitchen towel for 1 minute, then invert. Ladle apple butter into jars leaving 1/4 inch space at top. Run a thin knife between apple butter and sides of jars to eliminate air bubbles.

Sea, process, and cool filled jars. (see "process" guidelines below)

Let apple butter stand for a least 1 day to allow flavors to develop.

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Check out the USDA Canning Guidelines HERE

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For more canning fun check out this post on PICKLED STRAWBERRIES! Click here!

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Pickled Strawberries, Phantom Roommate Syndrome, and Pleasing Others

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Pickled Strawberries

I am in no position to beg for forgiveness regarding my absence with this blog. Naturally my apologies to my two faithful readers.

Let me see if I can catch you two up. 

In the last three months I have gained no ground on how to boil water on an electric stove top. I am 1000% convinced that they are the Devil’s work. Oddly, I have learned how to fry an egg on an electric stove top. It takes me more than twice as long as it did on a Heavenly blessed gas range, but still, I can fry an egg again.

In the last three months I have explored my vast new surroundings (read: the five square blocks that make up my new downtown living situation). There are wonderful fish tacos at King’s Crab Shack. Amazing wings and pizza at Ronni’s Restaurant. There is hardly anything Irish about the Irish bar down the street. And the dark horse winner is the oddly hipster bar around the corner that seats maybe 10 and has absolutely no online presence. One night I had to actually walk over there to see if they were open.

I have had to ban Pimento Cheese from my home. I have found a new love of air conditioning (Captain Planet will not be happy with me). And I have learned the difference between “y’all” and “all y’all”. 

Also I have slowly found my way back into my kitchen.

Though still suffering from phantom roommate syndrome (I am sure this is real even if it’s not on webMD) I am learning what it means to cook for one. By “cook for one” I mean I still cook for the roommate I don’t have and then I freeze the rest. My freezer has become a cook’s nightmare. 

Thanks to the cast of characters that I have met in my new Melrose Place of an apartment building I have been able to pawn off some of my baked goods. 

Most recently I found myself in possession of a flat of strawberries. And after learning that the good folks of North Carolina do not look kindly upon rhubarb I had to compromise my plans of pies and jams. Thankfully the latest copy of Southern Living arrived and suggested pickling my fruit. Which oddly sounds like a euphemism for a man in a cold pool. 

So with some pound cake, vanilla ice cream topped with pickled strawberries I fed some neighbors and filled a void. Then kindly edged the last of them out of my home by 930 because I am old and needed to catch up on my stories on the TV. 

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PICKLED STRAWBERRIES

Inspired by Southern Living Magazine but with modifications

INGREDIENTS

3 cups strawberries; quartered

1 ½ cups balsamic vinegar

1 ½ cups granulated sugar

1 ½ cups water

2 sprigs of fresh rosemary

¼ vanilla bean

INSTRUCTIONS

In saucepan over medium heat bring to boil vinegar, sugar, and water.

While this is coming to a boil pack your jars with your quartered strawberries, sprig of rosemary, and cut of vanilla bean.

Once the vinegar mixture has come to a boil pour directly over the strawberries in the jars.

Wipe rim of jar with clean towel and tightly place lid on jar. Let cool to room temperature.

Move to refrigerator when cooled.

Pickled strawberries will keep in refrigerator for one week. But they will most likely be gone in two days depending on your neighbors.

Until next time. 

And know that bullying clearly works because I wouldn’t have done this without threat. Thank you Tami Two. You would be Tami Number One Fan but my mother is Number One. 

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